It’s not every day that one can open a mainstream newspaper–any mainstream newspaper–and find a feature on King Diamond and Mercyful Fate. Yet that’s exactly what confronted readers of the October 18 edition of the Globe and Mail.
Here are three facts, as I understand them.
First is gravity. If it goes up, it comes down. Newton’s apple, et cetera.
Two: Belgium is a country in Europe, sure.
And three: Heavy metal is the best music.
Wait. Metal’s maybe not necessarily the best music. But it’s the mostmusic.
Metal seduces types who like the most of a thing. I mean, the genre’s defining joke is taking an amplifier that goes to 10 and making it go to 11. If you want the most power, the most dread, the most notes-per-guitar solo, you probably like heavy metal.
And if, in that whole superlative sonic panorama, you settle for nothing more than the most of the most, then you probably like King Diamond.