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Here are the finalists for Eurovision 2023

Look, I know that Eurovision is incomprehensible to many and you might wonder about my obsession with it. My interest is strictly in how weird things can get. Damn, it’s entertaining. Here’s a summary of everything to this point by the Popbitch newsletter.

“Tomorrow night is the Eurovision Grand Final and this year we’re delighted to tell you that all the mad shit made it through to the Saturday. Without juries to oversee the semis, there’s been a real end-of-term, teacher-lost-control energy to this year’s qualifiers. We’re talking Croatian drag punk, Moldovan folk rave, a Finnish Human Centipede, Serbian insomnia nightmares, Australian prog-metal, the ghost of Edgar Allen Poe and more.

“As ever, we’ve written a full song-by-song guide to take you through everything – and crammed it with loads of info, jokes, gossip and plenty of stuff that the hosts won’t tell you. It’s been FULLY UPDATED for the grand final and formatted to fit neatly on your phone.”

A few other Popbitch thoughts:

CROATIA: We’ve told you about all the times they’ve stuffed corks up their arses before, but Let3 are promising to perform naked over the final credits if they win. (There’s some genuine nervousness that they’re going to jump the gun and get their todgers out for the actual show too – but there’s more than enough going on on stage without their c**** and balls getting thrown into the mix).

GERMANY: Bulge-watchers who missed Ireland’s semi on Tuesday will still have something to look forward to on Saturday. Germany’s front man has been wearing a very figure-hugging outfit for rehearsals and word from backstage is that it looks ‘like he’s stuffed a tabby cat down there.'”

How can you NOT want to watch?
After two rounds of semifinals this week, we have the finalists for tomorrow’s big playdown at Liverpool’s M&S Bank Arena. Tens of millions of people will tune in for the finale of an event that dates back to 1956.

This is what happened with the first semifinal on Tuesday.

And this is what happened last night.

These countries will compete in this order. Sweden seems to be the odds-on favourite, although Finland, Croatia, and Israel could be threats.

  1. 🇦🇹 Austria | Teya & Salena – Who The Hell Is Edgar?
  2. 🇵🇹 Portugal | Mimicat – Ai Coração
  3. 🇨🇭 Switzerland | Remo Forrer – Watergun
  4. 🇵🇱 Poland | Blanka – Solo
  5. 🇷🇸 Serbia | Luke Black – Samo Mi Se Spava
  6. 🇫🇷 France: La Zarra – Évidemment
  7. 🇨🇾 Cyprus | Andrew Lambrou – Break A Broken Heart
  8. 🇪🇸 Spain: Blanca Paloma – Eaea
  9. 🇸🇪 Sweden | Loreen – Tattoo
  10. 🇦🇱 Albania | Albina & Familja Kelmendi – Duje
  11. 🇮🇹 Italy: Marco Mengoni – Due Vite
  12. 🇪🇪 Estonia | Alika – Bridges
  13. 🇫🇮 Finland | Käärijä – Cha Cha Cha
  14. 🇨🇿 Czechia | Vesna – My Sister’s Crown
  15. 🇦🇺 Australia | Voyager – Promise
  16. 🇧🇪 Belgium | Gustaph – Because Of You
  17. 🇦🇲 Armenia | Brunette – Future Lover
  18. 🇲🇩 Moldova | Pasha Parfeni – Soarele şi Luna
  19. 🇺🇦 Ukraine: TVORCHI – Heart of Steel
  20. 🇳🇴 Norway | Alessandra – Queen of Kings
  21. 🇩🇪 Germany: Lord of the Lost – Blood & Glitter
  22. 🇱🇹 Lithuania | Monika Linkytė – Stay
  23. 🇮🇱 Israel | Noa Kirel – Unicorn
  24. 🇸🇮 Slovenia | Joker Out – Carpe Diem
  25. 🇭🇷 Croatia | Let 3 – Mama ŠČ!
  26. 🇬🇧 United Kingdom: Mae Muller – I Wrote A Song

Want to watch?

Alan Cross

is an internationally known broadcaster, interviewer, writer, consultant, blogger and speaker. In his 40+ years in the music business, Alan has interviewed the biggest names in rock, from David Bowie and U2 to Pearl Jam and the Foo Fighters. He’s also known as a musicologist and documentarian through programs like The Ongoing History of New Music.

Alan Cross has 38443 posts and counting. See all posts by Alan Cross

One thought on “Here are the finalists for Eurovision 2023

  • So glad Finland’s totally fun performance came in second! Sweden’s female power vocalist was the predictable winner, unfortunately. Her long claws were rather fascinating, but vocally–meh. No different than most of the other popsters. The Australian rockers weren’t too bad, and Moldova’s Pasha Parfeni was pretty cool.

    Love Eurovision, even though we had to watch it with Swedish commentary!

    Reply

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