Wait: Lil Uzi Vert wants to buy his own PLANET? Yes.

Lil Uzi Vert, the Philadelphia-based rapper who parades around with a US$24 million dollar 10-carat pink diamond embedded in his forehead (well, it’s sometimes embedded there).

If that sort of conspicuous consumption wasn’t even, Vert is hoping to become the first person to buy a planet. You read that right.

Vert has his eye on WASP-127 b, a gas giant about 332 light-years from Earth and orbiting a G-type star. It’s a genuinely weird place, too. He’s apparently willing to buy this piece of real estate without visiting it first. He hasn’t said what he’ll do with the place, but if he plans to relocate there, the commute will be a bitch.

The news was broken by Grimes, the partner of the space mad Elon Musk.

Hold on. Can he actually do this? Well, no.

According to an international treaty signed in 1967, no state party can claim any territory in outer space. It doesn’t actually say that an individual can’t make some kind of claim, but it does state that nations reserve the right to supervise what their citizens might want to do.

At this point, no one can own anything outside our atmosphere. Yes, there was that guy who sent NASA a $20 parking ticket when one of their probes landed on an asteroid he’d claimed as his own (the ticket remains unpaid). And yes, people have been convinced to buy plots on the moon (16 billion acres to over seven million people!). But international space law trumps all.