Things I want for Christmas:
(1) A Porsche 918, fully-optioned.
(2) A continent-wide ban on anything named “Kardashian.”
(3) People to stop clapping whenever a contestant selects a Double Jeopardy clue. It’s unnecessary.
(4) No more Laughing Cow commercials.
(5) Weather forecasters to be flogged publicly when they predict massive snowstorms and then just shrug when they don’t happen.
Beyond that, I just want everyone to have a happy holidays–especially the people at Mediazoic who host this stuff for me.